file.newsgroup.cars.103181 Maven / Gradle / Ivy
From: [email protected] (Bradford Kellogg)
Subject: Re: Changing oil by self.
In article <[email protected]>, John Foster <[email protected]> writes:
|> I find this method much better myself, too, although I do really
|> hate it when the bolt finally comes loose and the wrench and my
|> hand both come crashing into my face. After coming to, which is
|> about 15 minutes later, I change my clothes (because by this time
|> all the oil has drained *on* me), and ice my entire face and suck
|> down about 20 Tylenol to ease the pain. Later in the day I then
|> proceed with refilling the engine oil.
|>
|> It's just crazy how I try and change the oil on my cars in one
|> weekend---I go through about 3 bottles of Tylenol and 2 bags of ice.
Oh, that's not so bad. Every time I try to change the oil, I forget to
shut off the engine first. The hot oil comes out and scalds me, blinds
me, then the engine starts to overheat, and while I'm screaming in agony
and trying to crawl out from under the car, I grab the red hot exhaust
pipe and get third degree burns on my hands. My screams intensify as I
finally emerge from under the car, and I struggle to my feet in front of
the car, whereupon the radiator hose ruptures and sprays me with super
heated coolant. Then the engine seizes, but not before the cylinder head
explodes, piercing my flesh with fragments of red hot iron.
This happens every time. I'm starting to think I should pay the mechanic
$25 instead paying the hospital $250,000 and the dealer $25,000 for a new
car. This gets costly when you change the oil every 3000 miles.
- Toadface